Friday, November 27, 2009

I need a vomitorium and a contest announcement


Like many Americans, yesterday I ate too much. In part, this is because my husband is half-Italian and his sister married a full Italian-American. So when they feast, they feast. In the style of the ancient Romans. We ate until we lay across the table and moaned.

And then, we ate pie.

No, seriously, it was a splendid affair. I have to give my sister-in-law internet kudos. She did an awesome job; her table was beautiful, her food was delicious and we all had a very nice time. (Despite yesterday's post!) Even the two-year-old was impressed.
(Even if his response to "what did you eat at Auntie's?" is "Poop!", it's an exuberant poop.)

I hope all of you feel the same.

And now--an ANNOUNCEMENT! (trumpet fanfare)




Okay, folks. Thanksgiving's over, Halloween's long gone. It's CHRISTMAS!(Yeah, that's me over there on the right, being all seasonal and 30's, with my bright red lipstick and high heels. Pretty festive.)

I thought we (meaning me and my two or three faithful readers, bless them) might have some fun.

You know those festive outdoor holiday displays that makes you stop your car and say (festively) "What the f--k?" You know, the kind that's either so over the top that nearby birds sing all night because they think the sun is up, or the half-hearted kind that consists of a single strand of blinking lights on a broken branch? Well--I wanna see 'em.

From now until Dec. 20th, please upload your festive display digi-photos to me at cynd@cdyates.com. (Compressed to fit jpgs or gifs only, please.I'm not a techie!) I'll upload them to my blog (until Blogger crashes, if necessary), for my first annual IS YOUR HOUSE ON FIRE, CLARK? contest. During the final week until Christmas, I'll post them and we'll vote. Categories: Most Blinding, Most Like a Brothel, Most Unfestive and (my favorite) Most Likely Not to Have Been at the Birth of Christ But On the Lawn Anyway. 

Prizes: Winners in each category will receive one book of mine, of their choice, ebook or in print (if available). If you don't know what I've written, go here to find out. Or--for my writer readers--if you've already read all my books (bless you!)--I'll put on my editor's hat and do a free critique of the first chapter of your completed manuscript.

So what are you waiting for? Git to clickin'!

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